Conversations to be had and Conversations held back

Feeling a little tired today. Pulled in the driveway last night about quarter to 12am after a whirlwind trip to Houston and New Orleans. The weather was wonderful! Humid as all get out... but warm. Warmth... it was such a wonderful thing...if only for 2 days!

So lots has been going on...so lots ot talk about. Regarding the title of my post... I will start with the "Conversations held back" and then tell you about "Conversations to be had".

Have you ever seen a family and you just wonder, just wonder, how the hell the parents ever became parents? I was about this close to getting into probably a very ugly conversation with a set of parents last night. Like words were literally brewing in my chest and it took everything in me not to say something...although I am certain my face probably said it all. So as I mentioned I got in late last night. My flight from Baltimore to Providence was delayed about 40 minutes. So when we actually landed in Providence it was after 10:30pm. There was a couple and their son sitting in the aisle across from me. The child was sitting near the window, but I couldn't really see him- I had no idea how old he was. Occasionally during the flight I could hear him laugh out loud at the movie he was watching- it was a cute giggle. So we are headed in for our landing and he starts to get upset. I am not sure what caused him to get upset, but it could have been the fact that he had to end his movie or that his ears hurt or that it was 10 freaking 30-- who knows. He starts to get upset. Really upset and starts crying. Well this sets his mother off. I am watching her out of the corner of my eye and you can tell she is just getting pissed off. Then she looks at her husband and asks for permission to slap him in the face. ASKS for permission to SLAP him in the face. What? Are you f-ing kidding me? This is where I start to get pissed. So the father says "Yes." Again- WTF? So I then witness her slap him 3 times. I am telling you- my face- HORRIFIED. Horrified. Anger was bubbling up. Now mind you- I still cant actually see the kid. So finally we get to the gate and I can stand up. Now I can see him. No joke- he couldn't have been much older than 3 years old. I was furious. Furious! The kid is exhausted. You as parents chose to take a late flight- yes- I understand- it was delayed, but regardless we would have landed after 10 anyways. And now, when you child is exhausted and cranky- you are going to slap him across the face for it? Ugh! Truly- it took everything in  me to not say something. Now, please understand- I am not against disciplining children- in some cases I do think it is necessary. I can remember getting a hand to the mouth a handful of time- but in reality- that punishment was appropriate because it was usually the follow up to me running my mouth off to my mother. I was not 3 years old at the time. What exactly could a 3 year old do that would warrant a slap to the face? I honestly cant think of anything. Unbelievable.

Whew... that a a really long paragraph. I just needed to get it out. I was pissed. I am still pissed. Poor kid. I hope those parents learn to get their temper under control.I am sure I will see worse in the future- but last night just really bothered me.

Now... for conversations to be had. So the following facts about me and my life are true:

• I have the most awesome son in the whole world
• I have a fabulously supportive husband who is in the Navy
• I have a great job, work for a great company and travel a lot because of these
• I have the most awesome son in the whole world... oh wait... did I already say that?

So of those 4 bullets above there is one piece that has been weighing on me very heavily lately. Travel. Traveling has been great. I have loved it. I have been afforded the opportunity to see many parts of this country that I would likely have never visited, but... BUT... because of bullet #2... things need to change. As you all know, Gary is in the Navy. For the past 4 years- things have been easy! 3 years on shore duty- easy peasy! First year on this boat- piece of cake. But oh how things while changing here soon. Seems construction is moving right along on his new boat. So much so that their calendar (construction schedule) is actually shifting- shifting to the left- which means the boat will be ready sooner than expected. Great news, right? Well... yes and no. Yes because this means Gary will get to get back out to sea and do the job he has trained 19 years for. No, because this means there needs to be some major shifts with my career to accommodate this.

So, in recently talking with a friend who currently works for the same company as me- it turns out that there is a position open that would be a similar level to where I am now, but no traveling. Open the heavens and sing with me-- Aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Can you hear me?? No traveling! This would be perfect! So we started conversations and got the ball rolling. Well... we started conversations with everyone but my current boss. Yup- that is the "conversation to be had." To say that I am dreading this would be an understatement, but it needs to be done. If this conversation wasn't happening now, it would be happening 4-5 months from now. This is my reality. My reality is that when Gary starts going out to sea- I need to be prepared to take on the role of "single parent." I wont be able to rely on Gary to be here. If he is here- wonderful, but this isn't our first time at this rodeo. I know with sub life there are no guarantees and I need to be prepared for that. Schedule for the Navy is only a word that can be written on paper- it means nothing to them. And as I have said it before- Gary is married to the Navy- I am just his mistress! :)

So- everyone say a little prayer that tomorrow goes well. I am confident that this opportunity is here for a reason and I am excited! I get to learn new stuff and explore an area of our company that I haven't had my experience with. More about it to come!!

And just to share- Liam wasnt happy with me this morning because I kept trying to get a picture of him in his new (from Christmas- thank you Aunt Marie!) outfit.

Ha! Look at that face!!